Thursday, January 11, 2007

Somewhat lonesome

So I haven’t been updating my blog much lately, probably because I’ve been busy since I’ve start working 2 months ago and also studying for this few exams I have this semester and hopefully it will be my last as well.
Haven’t been complaining much, the year started well for me family, and financially wise as for personal life I’m not sure yet things have been so mixed up for me and I guess I’ve been going through the stage of being lonesome or maybe feeling lonly

Some on said “loneliness is the worst of all evils. Unlike hunger, thirst and illness, which force us to take an attitude when they affect us, loneliness is often masked under an aura of virtue and renunciation.”

But then The worst is feeling alone while you’re surrounded by many people, people you know, people you don’t know, people you care about, people you don’t care about. People you love and people you hate.

My feeling alone is almost at a close, and I must say that I feel a little split between it being a waste and it feeling like what my soul needed; moments to sit back and take a mental inventory. Time to reflect on my life and bounce ideas off of myself.

Maybe it is that I miss being in love

Maybe I miss all of the comfort that it comes with. I miss the small nuances and epic emotions that flood my being. I miss having the certainty that being in love provides. I miss the sanctuary it gives. I miss the holding hands… I’m afraid I’ve grown to fear love and those fishing with it’s utterance. I am afraid that I might never know what being in love again is. Maybe nobody ever really does; or maybe it’s just that love is so different from one person to the next.

Ahhh lonliness brings such lonesome feelings ...